A little talk to my self

I wish I can tell you that cancer is a short term business. A glitch in your lifetime journey.
That it will be over once you've dealt with it
And then you can walk on with your head held high, waving that survivor flag victoriously
That simple

But then, like you might hear thousands times before, nothing is that simple in life

Including cancer.
Especially cancer

It's a lifetime occupation.
Once it touched you, there's no escape.
Not even after finishing your treatment.
Not even after your lovely doctor tell you that you finally in remission, NED, cured
It will still be there. Hovering over your head like the sword of Damocles
It's in every pain that you feel, every itch, every numbness no matter how small
It's in the short and long term side effects you have to deal, even years after
It's in every doctor appointment, every blood drawing, every scan
Maybe not physically. God forbid, no. I sincerely hope it will never be. Never again.
But the shadow, the dark mark that sucks your happiness dry and leave you breathless in unending worries

I'm not trying to scare you or start my own pity party
It's just the reality
Mine at least

But don't be discouraged.
It might be hard, but not impossible to do
Just take it one at a time, day by day, step by step
It might not go away, but it doesn't have to take over your life
Be patient to yourself. Take your time.
It's ok to grieve, to cry, to feel helpless
But don't dwell there too long.
Be happy. Laugh.
If you can't find the reason, create one. It doesn't have to be something grand. Small things will do.
Because we still have so much in us beside that cancer thing.

*ngomong apa sih gue*